88 www.ReadMPM.com | www.MountPleasantMagazine.com | www.MountPleasantPodcast.com On any given afternoon, Natausha May might be rushing her son to cello lessons, driving across town to flush out her father’s catheter or making lesson plans for her students. A few miles away, Melinda Blitch finishes her workday at home, only to begin her second shift: bathing and caring for her father while getting dinner ready and helping her daughter with homework. Welcome to the world of the “sandwich generation:” adults pressed between raising children and caring for aging parents. According to the Journal of the American Geriatrics Society, over 2.5 million Americans are in this situation. It’s a life of relentless scheduling, emotional whiplash and often overwhelming guilt. But as taxing as it can be on the caregiver, it is a labor of love. For May, the transition into caregiving came unexpectedly in 2019. Her father, once a ballroom dance instructor with a vibrant social life in Savannah, Georgia, fell while trying to catch his wife from falling, and soon after, May and her husband began taking care of him. “We thought it would be short-term,” she said. “But then he was diagnosed with Parkinson’s. Everything changed very quickly.” As her father’s condition declined, so did his independence. He moved into a local senior living community but soon required a level of care that pushed the limits. “We were hemorrhaging money. Assisted living was $8,000 a month, and we still had to hire extra help because they weren’t getting him to dinner on time or showering him regularly,” May shared. Eventually, she moved her father to a more affordable and attentive facility, but the cost still looms. May is pleased with the facility workers and hospice care, but they are limited in what they can do because of the label of his level of care – a threshold that would more than double the monthly costs – so May still manages elements of his care like flushing the catheter. All the while, she and her husband are raising their middle school-age son, Jackson, and supporting his involvement in golf, cello and taekwondo. “I feel guilt either way,” stated May. “I’m either missing time with my dad or I’m missing time with my family. It’s a constant balancing act.” Melinda Blitch is a single mother caring for her 11-year-old daughter and her 78-year-old father who lives with them and suffers from dementia. Blitch’s caregiving journey started slowly; she recognized signs, tried to persuade her father to get tested and finally moved him in after a knee surgery caused a steep decline. Stuck in the Middle Realities of the Sandwich Generation BY ANNE TOOLE senior living Natausha May strives to find balance between teaching, family life and caring for her father. www.CharlestonRetirementLiving.com | www.RetiringtoSouthCarolina.com | www.CoastalRetirementTowns.com
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